27.11.11

Good night.

I have no clue what's wrong with myself. Maybe I'm a little dramatic, maybe I'm a little unreasonable, or maybe I'm just sensitive. Or maybe it's my mood swings.

Funny how one can mess things up with the intention of making things right. When you're on a close lookout for the mines and instead of defusing it, you stepped on another mine hidden beside it. Then you blow everything up and hurt everyone in the process, including yourself. Then you feel terrible and guilty for stepping on that stupid mine despite knowing it was an accident. But the people you hurt are blaming you. After all, you were the one who stepped on that bomb. Can't possibly blame anyone else right?

Who would want to hurt the person they love the most? All you wanna do is try your hardest to make sure everything is in tip-top condition for him/her.

Ever had the feeling where you wanted to try to be the best for someone you love?
That feeling where you feel like he/she deserves perfection, and you want to be perfect for him/her.
And then that feeling when you make a mistake and he/she looks at you with disappointment.

Yeah.. Well it sucks..

I'm exhausted. From crying.
It's been two days in a row. Not my record, but my record for the past few months.
Wow I've really improved huh. Not.


Good night people. I hope your night was far more beautiful than mine.

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